8 thoughts on “Now this is an interesting read.   

  1. WOW…this is true! And so sad…because this happen all the time. When the most of the people lisent the word*gay* think about a male! …still is not allowed a woman can be gay… a man could be perfectly play the roll of a woman or man. But a woman! Is not allowed and being gay ** is the worst sacrilege* when in a man is funny*. Thank you +Jennifer Bailey you made me think about it with this post.

  2. When John Lennon said "Woman is the nigger of the world" back in 1972, everyone was either terribly upset or just rolled their eyes – oh, there goes John Lennon saying something crazy again.

    After raising two daughters, watching them become women, coming to terms with how much more difficult it is to be a girl, I don't sense all that much has changed.  Male privilege is so endemic, it's rather like an optical illusion, trying to detect it.  Let me tell you, having daughters will bring male privilege into focus like nothing else.

    Quietly, on my own, having supervised teams with women on them, especially Indian women, I've conducted assertiveness training.  I've purposely given these women an impossible task on paper, let them look at it for 30 seconds, then told them "This is an impossible task.  I want you to tell me it's impossible."   The reactions I've gotten are all over the map.  It's incredibly difficult for these women to stand up and push back.  But it simply must be done.  Someone has to do it.

    I'm not gay.  Been around the gay culture pretty much all my adult life: two important friends from high school were gay.  Truth is, I find gay culture insular and deeply weird, more like high school.  If gay culture treats women anything like it does straight men, it's really just another form of groupthink.  

    I lived through Desegregation in the 60s and 70s.  America's now more segregated than ever – this time, by choice.  If LGBTQ wants to be included, it's high time they were more inclusive.  But they won't be, for the same reasons nobody else is inclusive.  

  3. Great article and he brings up a handful of good points. I had a gay guy friend who worked in an office of about 50/50 male/female ratio. All the girls were constantly around him, asking questions, going to lunch, inviting him out for drinks, parties, whatever. He never said anything controversial to them while at work and he indicated he didn't at social events either. However, when we had one on one time he would ask me what's so special about pussy [his word] Why did women think their shit didn't stink? Etc.

    Another thing I found interesting is the author's observations about a closed cultural system. In short, gay men dont respect women because they don't hang out with women very often except as a tool or a crutch. I read a similar statement about the male dominated Islamic cultures where women and men are separated socially. As a result of an entire culture separated as a matter of course, the young unmarried men couldn't learn to respect women.

  4. Great article in that it recognizes the full issue and let's woman know they should push back and not take these insults even if the guy is gay. He has no more right to abuse you than anyone else. A couple of paragraphs really stood out for me.

    "We are encouraged not to address the ways in which gay men might use abusive language towards, in reference to, or even in front of women. We are encouraged not to do this to such a startling degree that when we do try to act in the interest of decency, we end up getting victim-blamed."

    " It would also mean demanding better behavior–and expecting many gay men to understand that women do not exist to add value to gay men around them and nor do they exist in a parallel universe. Repackaging gay male identity would mean that they understand the importance of language and personal space–and that “It’s okay because I’m gay,” is no longer an excuse for any kind of lewd behavior."

    Thanks for sharing +Jennifer Bailey its articles like these that can teach us all what's right and wrong with our behavior and or our reactions to bad behavior.

    The article brought up a good point that we should all consider. I think it is true for everyone that if you only surround yourself with like people that have similar thoughts and ideas you definitely will not grow as a person. Its important for everyone to be open to learn from people from all cultures and walks of life ad to respect your fellow human (male or female). It makes life so much more interesting and wonderful.

  5. For me this is a fine example how society shapes us and our habits. They are mostly awful if you think about it.

    For example,  I know a whole lot of deeply anti-gay phrases I used to say without further thought or having thought of gay people at all. The same for those very young male kids who call women a bitch, they probably often only have no clear idea what they are saying and later on they don't care as it becomes "normal".

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